


slowly drifting, wave after wave

by hotelbooks



Series: works lowkey based off songs [2]
Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: Angry Calum, Angst, Happy Ending, I hate that, M/M, Mentions of Suicide, Sad Calum, Sad Michael, Waves, dont worry, im sorry, lashton arent mentioned sorry, lowkey based off of waves by mr probz, michael feels calm with the waves, this is so sad, trigger warning??
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-09
Updated: 2015-12-09
Packaged: 2018-05-05 18:39:21
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,206
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5386301
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hotelbooks/pseuds/hotelbooks
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>freedom; absolute, complete freedom was the feeling at that moment. nothing could stand in the way of the ocean. the ocean was unstoppable, unbreakable, it could take down anything that threatened it. that’s all that could be felt at that exact moment. everything was peaceful, no sound could be heard and there was no land in sight. if this would never end, it would be enjoyed.</p>
            </blockquote>





	slowly drifting, wave after wave

**Author's Note:**

> this is super duper sad and also trigger warning kinda idk please be careful)):

the waves crashed onto shore, rumbling and rushing until it couldn’t reach any higher and rolled back down into the depths of the ocean. the roars of the massive amounts of water it’s the stretched body was like thunder, rumbling greatly for all to hear. it soaked every bit of rock and sand it could reach, rolling over the shores of the beach and up over the tall, mountainous rocks lining the surface. droplets of water rolled down those rocks, disappearing into the already wet sand from the rain. the wind blew furiously, threatening to rip branches off of tall trees near the top of the beach. it whistled loudly, stirring the ocean currents into large, monster-like waves that pushed their way onto shore.

cold, trembling, bare toes stood at the edge of a high rock, body trembling the slightest, wondering whether it be fear or how old it was outside in just a t-shirt that caused the trembling, or whether it was tears or small rain droplets streaming down pale, blotchy cheeks. green eyes stared soullessly out into the endless blue of the ocean, watching the waves crash up against the rock stood upon. the reflection of the waves made the crystal eyes almost look blue, or maybe it was just the eyes in general, since they haven’t shown their bright colour in years. those sparkly green irises had lost their sparkle way before they found comfort in watching how aggressive the waves hit the surface.

shaking hands clenched into fists to attempt to stop the shaking, bottom lip being bitten to stop it from trembling. it hurt, and blood could be tasted, but no cares were given. pale, drenched skin almost felt like it was turning blue the longer the rain poured down, but there was no movement. just standing on the edge of a rock, getting wet by both the pouring rain and the furious waves. bright hair blew angrily in the strong winds, the dampness hitting the cold winds making hands tremble harder than before. thoughts drifted to the waves, wondering what it was like to be so free. dull eyes fell shut and there was a deep, shaky breath, and the shaking stopped. it could be felt the water on his bare feet, but it almost felt non-existent. there was no more cold sense running through the veins, and when eyes opened, the sky was clear and the waves couldn’t be heard. looking down, bare feet were set upon the blue stretch of the ocean, unable to see the bottom because of how deep it was. they didn’t sink, however. The feet stayed above the blue, the only thing showing that the feet were actually on the water were the small ripples spreading from underneath them. trembling lips spread into a small smile, taking a few small steps forward without sinking to their death. 

freedom; absolute, complete freedom was the feeling at that moment. nothing could stand in the way of the ocean. the ocean was unstoppable, unbreakable, it could take down anything that threatened it. that’s all that could be felt at that exact moment. everything was peaceful, no sound could be heard and there was no land in sight. if this would never end, it would be enjoyed.

eyes closed again, and the silence filling ears was replaced with loud rumbling. engulfed in a cold liquid made the small smile fade to a frown, eyes opening to meet the dark sky and the crashing waves. feet inched closer to the edge.

there was no freedom in this life like there was in the ocean. so many responsibilities and problems and sadness and war and anger, and nothing was okay about it. a shaky breath escaped pale blue lips, a warm tear slipping down cold cheeks. hands unclenched, body trembled harder than it had been since the rock was stood upon. a choked sob followed after, everything was so hard. Too hard to handle at this point, and an escape was needed. there was no longer a want for life in the dull green eyes and the bright hair, and everything just felt so wrong around the shivering body, like it didn’t belong. the feeling of freedom lost at sea was replaced with anger and sadness and a desperate want to get out. 

over top of the thundering sounds of water crashing against rock, aloud, distant voice could be heard, at least thirty feet away from where bare feet were placed.

“michael! mikey, please don’t move.”

feet lifted off the wet rock. a wave captured the trembling body, the rush of air from moving downward quickly made the shivering worse. a hard crush of pressure was felt around the shivering body, and the waves could no longer be heard. it hurt at first, the impact of the liquid, but the shivering stopped. it wasn’t cold anymore. a deep breath in was all it took before water began filling lungs. the pain from lack of oxygen burned on the inside, eyes stinging from the saltiness of the water.   
eyes closed a final time, not having the strength to open again. at last, freedom was his, and nothing could stop it.

 

except, one thing.

 

another body hit the surface of the water, sinking down into the cold, deep liquid. Eyes burned from the salt water, but desperately tried to stay open, in search of the only thing that mattered. eyes landing on the pale, limp body, tan arms wrapped around the lifeless being and legs began kicking to the surface. it was a twenty foot drop, and it hurt to hit the surface. he couldn’t imagine what it was like for the pale boy. 

pulling michael’s body onto the beach shore, calum began pressing his hands harshly into his chest. “please, please don’t take him,” calum mumbled angrily, pressing his lips to michael’s and breathing air into his water filled lungs.

water came spitting out from michael’s blue lips, his chest heaving up and down unevenly. calum lifted the boy up and michael began spilling the water out from his mouth, coughing roughly. his eyes remained closed. calum thanked god, or jesus, or anyone who answered his pleas. michael was okay.

green eyes fluttered open to meet brown ones, and closed again.

“why, why did you stop me? i wanted to be free.”

calum sobbed, crashing his lips against michael’s pale, cold ones. he kissed michael with so much love and passion, like if he were to stop, michael’s life would slip right through his fingers again. he didn’t want to lose the love of his life. calum pulled away eventually, letting michael breathe properly, since his lungs desperately needed the oxygen anyway. he stared into the green eyes, noticing a glint of feeling in them. a glint of happy.

“i’ll be your freedom, mikey,” calum mumbled, running a hand through michael’s soaked hair. “as long as you’ll be mine. promise?”

calum held out his pinky, and michael looked down at it. he was hesitant, looking back up at calum for any sign of lying or sadness. there was nothing but hope, determination and love; pure, complete love spilled into the brown of calum’s eyes. michael wrapped his pinky around calum’s.

“promise.”


End file.
